There always comes a time where I want to delete everything;
my facebook, twitter, tumblr, and this blog.
I want to disappear and have nothing to do with anyone.
Although I'm in a good place with God,
I feel really unhappy and try to keep my head above water.
No one understands what I'm going through,
and no one ever will, but I don't expect them to.
I'm still searching for peace in every area of my life.
my facebook, twitter, tumblr, and this blog.
I want to disappear and have nothing to do with anyone.
Although I'm in a good place with God,
I feel really unhappy and try to keep my head above water.
No one understands what I'm going through,
and no one ever will, but I don't expect them to.
I'm still searching for peace in every area of my life.
Wow. I'm mad that I'm not your friend right now. I always read your blogs and I for sure know that you have a genuine relationship with Christ. Being a young believer has been one of the most TRYING situation and experience I've ever had to endure. From self esteem to choices I made with guys, to not wanting to live anymore, to spending days on days in bed, drinking myself to sleep, taking 2hr showers to sit & cry, cutting myself off from everything & everyone ... trust me I've done it ALL.
ReplyDeleteI can't say I know & understand exactly what you're going through because I don't. But I can empathize and have a hurt heart about it. Staying encouraged while going through situations that seem to be unbearable are quite frankly 'unbearable' at times but GOD wouldn't allow you to experience anything if you weren't capable of overcoming it.
You're super beautiful different, and intelligent. Christ is so preparing you to be used for his name's sake, and even if you can't see how or why what you're experiencing could possibly have a promising result know that HE is the great I am with great promises for those who trust in him and live for him. Think about how far you've come, why would he bring you to the pinnacle of this trial and leave you?
I sometimes suffer from mild depression and I have moments (days or weeks) where I cry myself to sleep because I feel alone or unhappy for whatever reasons. I have a problem with looking at other people's lives and comparing myself, I get wrapped up in that and becoming extremely sad. I'm still asking Christ to work on my happiness, and I've been trusting that he will, and he's slowly been revealing things to me and allowing me to live with a spirit of genuine peace & happiness.
I pray that you would continue to stay encouraged. Know that there is purpose in all you go through. Im TELLING you ! From one sister in Christ to another <3