This year has been tremendously full of romance and love. I've attended three wedding, known of many more ceremonies, and have been notified of engagements. Every time I turn around the question has been popped and vows have been exchanged. With each moment I was excited for my own future; dating, engagement, marriage.
The more weddings I attended the more discouraged I became. Not necessarily because I don't think it can happen for me, but because I don't think I deserve to be married. Each time I heard the pastor speak of the holy sanction of marriage I sunk deeper into my seat because I do not think I am, or will be, the kind of person that should hold that title. The saving of the heart, the chasing after Christ, the ability to be a godly wife and mother. I can't even be a godly single woman correctly, let a lone be united with another for the rest of our lives.
Aww, God knows your heart. Don't settle, I been with a guy for 5years and he still hasn't popped the question. Yes, its very discouraging, but I keep going in my everyday life in hopes God will lead me in the right way and bring the right guy into my life who is ready and willing to give me what I know I deserve (and so do you).
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