Solitude.

I came into the world alone...

I feel so lonely right now. I had a sudden thought that no one really cares about anyone but themselves or what they're doing at that moment. Did I even word that right? I don't think it makes sense but it does in my head at least. I've learned something about myself tonight; no matter how much love a receive from multiple people, if that one person I want the love from doesn't show it, then it means nothing to me about what the others think. My feelings end up being hurt. How unfair of me. I did it again didn't I; That didn't make sense did it? I'm a homebody. It's choice. Well usually it's because I have no where to go nor anyone to see...so it might not really be as choice as much as an obvious reason not to leave the house. It's always late at night when I'm alone that my mind starts to wander and I end up with thoughts like these. I don't feel like anyone is here for me whenever. When I want to get my feelings out, I pick up my phone and just look at it. No one comes to mind about 99% of the time. The other 1%, I don't feel right calling that one person who comes to mind. Maybe I don't like to build relationships with people. I haven't figured out who I am, so what if they do before me? There's this one guy who could read me and tell me about myself. He knew me more than I knew myself. He's no longer in my life. But I'm okay with that. I just contradicted myself; I feel lonely yet I don't mind that some people aren't in my life. I need therapy. There is something seriously wrong with me.

...I'll leave the world alone.